The extraordinarily overwhelming and unavoidable state of single mindedness and almost blindingly impaired judgment preceding sexual release. Often used as an explanation for certain cases of seemingly out of character behavior. This is usually followed by The Afters, a powerful state of shame, embarrassment, and regret, immediately following sexual release.
Guy 1: What the fuck is wrong with you? You walked out of your room wearing nothing but a Gene Simmons mask and a fleshlight, and proceeded to loudly gratify yourself until you creamed all over Liz.
Guy 2: I hadn’t gotten off in a week. I had a really bad case of the befores...
An anxiety disorder characterized by extreme fear of running out of Natty Light at any event or gathering, but most notably way too early in the night.
Good god, last night as the party was gettin legit, and I was gettin balls deep in Liz, I suffered from a nattastrophobia attack. I shoved that cock juggling thunder cunt to the floor and ran to the fridge ass naked to find six fresh cases. I love my roommates.
When a Mexican chick takes a mouthful of tequila, preferably Jose Cuervo, and you place your scrotum in her mouth while she gargles, resulting in a hot tub effect for your testes. A variant to the classic fuzzy warbler.
Guy 1: "Did you slay that fine Mexican mami last night?"
Guy 2: "Fuck no man, you know how easily Mexicans get knocked up, but she did give me the best Jose Hot Tub north of the border."
Having a cold hand, either your own or a partner's, grab your penis, causing it to shrink like a frightened turtle.
Good god, Liz's hand was so icy that she gave me a cold choke. It took me a good few minutes to get hard, but thankfully I blew my load all over her tits, like the whorish cunt she is. Even ZZ Top would have been proud of that pearl necklace.
#dick#handjob#frightened turtle#pearl necklace#zz top#fuzzy warbler#masterbation#jose hot tub#jackson pollack